Wednesday, 4 January 2012

Heart Is Still Talking

Had a dream earlier today.

I was walking back to my friends home I'm staying with till I get my own place, to find Someone was sat under the A14 bridge I walk under. Thinking 'Oh Shit!' I walked fast and found it was who I thought it to be. My ex fiance. He tried to talk to me but I explained to him that I was trying to fall out of love with him and get on with my life again. What life I could have in a town that reminds me of him...!

Then I ended up in my single bed n felt someone kiss me. I smiled and then realized that I'm single in my friend's home so who could it be!? I woke up startled and found it wasn't the BF of my friend (thank god!) but was my ex again!

Then I woke up.

I hate it when I have my heart hoping for things like that. It's bad enough when I walk back from work constantly thinking that one of the cars passing me could well be him. or find him waiting back at my friends place for me. I know that with me taking myself off FB has told him I want to get over things on my own so he has left me alone. But my heart still hopes that there is something there for me to hold on to. But my head knows better. Knows that it is for the best and cannot stand to go through this again if he was to chase after me.

Once I move back, that is it for us... no turning back.


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